Dating outside the box

Delmar man's singles services promises to do it differently

Match.com, eHarmony, plentyoffish... The Web is flush with sites that promise to pair you with your soul mate. So how does Larry Wilson plan to make his a success?

By going directly against what other cyberdating services are doing, and towards a simple concept that is almost universally agreed upon: opposites attract.

Our culture is based on opposites, said Wilson, who got into the Internet dating scene after his divorce.

Popular sites paired the Delmar resident with beautiful, intelligent women that he had a lot in common with, and who he accompanied on flat, uninteresting dates.

"They try to set you up with your perfect, harmonious match, a mirror image," he said of such matchmakers. "You think you know everything there is to know about this person, so you end up not asking deep, penetrating questions."

Oppositesconnect.com aims to dowell, just the opposite. Through a personality test and other features, the site will suggest matches with locals who don't share your interests.

Not only will that lead to new and interesting experiences, but foster more interesting discussion, said Wilson.

"You're likely to respect each other for your differences of opinion, and the dig down deeper for the things you do agree on," he said.

Diane Lykes, a licensed psychotherapist with Synergy Counseling Associates in Albany, said she agreed with Wilson when he brought the idea to her. Her practice deals in couples and individual relationship counseling.

"We though that it was a great idea and something that hasn't been tried before," she said, and a great idea for her clients with relationship difficulty.

"They'd been dating the same type of person over and over again and having the same poor outcome," she continued.

"We do have a lot of clients who come in who are on multiple sites and are very disappointed with the dates," said Patricia DeVost, who also works at Synergy as a therapist. "In my own relationship, I think me and my partner, my husband, are exact opposites So on a personal level I could see how beneficial it would be."

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